Does It Make Me Desperate?

July 30, 2012May 29, 2025 notsosexinthecity

I need to ask you a question, because something happened today… and I’m just wondering: does it make me desperate? Or am I simply taking life into my own hands? I’ll let you decide…

I was minding my own business today, at work, doing my thing, and I came across a man so beautiful that I fell in love right there and then. He was so hot. Seriously hot. Probably one of the most beautiful men I’ve ever seen in my life. And because of that, I stammered, stuttered, and blushed my way through a series of words that didn’t make up full sentences and basically made a right tit out of myself.

Nicely played, girl. Nicely played.

He did his thing, paid for his stuff, and then left my store to go across the mall and into a shop on the other side. I couldn’t help but stare after him as he left, something that didn’t go unnoticed to my three colleagues.

“Go after him,” they dared one by one. (Advice from two males and one female.)

So … I did. I took a deep breath, pumped myself up, and trotted after the man the beautiful man that would probably, definitely turn me down.

I’d hastily scribbled my phone number down on a piece of paper five minutes previously, deciding against giving it to him because I work at work, he was a customer, and that seemed hella unprofessional, but I held it tightly in my hand as I sidled up to him.

“Hey, sorry to interrupt you, and I hope this is okay, but you said you were new in town so I thought I’d offer my services as a tour guide. If you ever get lonely in your room, give me a text and we’ll go for a drink!”

I placed the piece of paper in his hand, gave him a smile, and walked away. It was so cool, I don’t know how I managed to pull it all together. I was so proud of myself. I’m not much of a first-stepper, usually preferring to use my body language and subtly coerce the other person into asking me out, but I’d done it. I’d asked out a truly beautiful man, in truly stalker-like fashion, rather unprofessionally during work hours.

I immediately regretted my decision, of course. Because that’s the kinda gal I am.

But he was so beautiful. I can barely remember what he looks like, he’s just this fuzzy, golden glow in my mind. I remember him having the brightest, whitest, straightest smile, and stunning blue eyes that twinkled as he smiled at me. How could I not give it a try? Wouldn’t I have kicked myself forever if I hadn’t? And it’s not like I broke any rules. Technically, I was on a break from work. Bumping into him and giving him my number was almost the same as bumping into a stranger on my lunch hour at work, buying myself a sandwich.

Who am I trying to convince here? I was unprofessional and a little desperate. I shoulda left the beautiful man alone.

I discussed the matter with Bestie when I got home from work, telling him about my little jaunt across the mall to stalk a man, and he called me desperate. Am I desperate? Really? What’s wrong with telling someone that you find attractive, that you find them attractive? It’s not like I’d have carried on chasing him if the beautiful man had told me he was dating someone, married, or not interested. He could’ve said no to me at any point, for any reason, without even giving me a reason, and I’d have walked away feeling sorry for myself. Isn’t life about taking a few risks? Isn’t that just what I did today?

I know you’re wondering what happened after I gave the beautiful man my phone number in the coolest, slightly stalkery way, aren’t you? He text me back. Not just once, but again and again and again. He’s single, only in the country for eight more days before he goes away with the military for a while, but he’s definitely interested in learning more about me.